The RIGHT Strengths

Many management and leadership gurus are encouraging people to operate within their core strengths.  But, have you ever doubted whether your “sovereign foundation” included the RIGHT strengths to advance your career or your business?

Just the other day, a colleague was telling me about her highschool friend who grew up in a home with a very successful, military-minded father.  One of his brothers joined the Peace Corps before going to law school.  The other brother went to Virginia Military Institute and is an officer in the Navy.  This young man, though, didn’t seem to “fit” and, while he was very gifted in several areas, none of these more “artsy” or “soft” strengths seem to qualify.   To this day, he feels like he would have to be someone else entirely in order to gain his parent’s acceptance. I can relate.

So, what about you?  Do your strengths “not qualify” at work? At home?  At church?   While there may be NO existing outlet in your life for your strengths to be showcased, there is no law against creating one!!  What do others regularly say you are “a natural” at doing?  What are you doing when you “forget the time” because you enjoy it so much?  Why not ACTIVELY look for an opportunity to operate out of THIS strength?

A Marriage “Happens” After the Wedding

I left for Canada yesterday to meet with the Leadership of the Halifax Regional Municipality in Halifax, Nova Scotia.   Even though it required Lea to wake up before 4:30 AM to bring me to the airport, that’s exactly what she did.  I joke that we’ve been happily married for 15 years, and 15 out of 22 ain’t bad.   But, seriously, I love being married and one thing we love to do together is attend the weddings of our friends and family members.

As a man, I am always amazed at the detail, preparation and enormous focus that goes into planning the wedding.  Everything has to go “just right”…  They want an INCREDIBLE wedding day.  My prayer is always that the couple has AT LEAST thought about preparing for the marriage itself.    =)

In business, I see the same phenomenon occurring… our focus is on what’s NEW… what’s EXCITING…  We prepare for the LAUNCH of our businesses, but often find ourselves surprised by the effort it takes to sustain and grow it.  We spend a great deal of time and effort in “hiring the RIGHT employees,” often without a plan to developing our existing team.  We focus on getting NEW clients or customers, without going back to our existing client base to look for more ways to serve them.  We purchase new curriculum or implement new strategies, without taking a long, hard look at what is currently working.

This week, I am focusing on going back to the basics…. I am prepared to come along side my clients, my roundtable members, and my own team to develop opportunities (and an ideal environment) for GROWTH.  I invite you to join me!

How to Reinvent in a Dying Industry

I once read a very astute marketing consultant’s opinion of the newspaper industry.  He concluded that it was a “dying industry” and commented that “not since the town crier delivered the news” had he seen an industry truly facing extinction.  I agree that the industry is facing extinction… but ONLY if they don’t do something NOW to become as indispensable and relevant as they were in their industry “prime”.  And to be sure, the newspaper industry doesn’t stand alone in their need for reinvention and relevance.

While the dinosaurs may not have been able to escape their own extinction, today’s organizations are run by people… individuals who were created with the ability to reason, to create, and to navigate obstacles…. Individuals whose potential will never go “extinct”.

If you are leading an organization, association, business or INDUSTRY that looks with “dread” towards the future, I encourage you to do three things:

1) ACKNOWLEDGE REALITY.   Acknowledge (in detail and specifics) the top three challenges you are facing – no matter how daunting they appear.

2) ASK THE RIGHT QUESTION.  Ask yourself this one question, and spend some time journaling (if alone) or brainstorming (if in a group): Given what we are up against, what do we want to CREATE?

3) CULTIVATE SUPERIOR FOCUS.  Focus, when strategically applied to an (even daunting) obstacle, has the power to penetrate and expose.  FOCUS on HOW you can achieve RELEVANCE and be viewed as an INDISPENSABLE resource to the customers or clients you serve.  What specifically can you do?

Finally, ponder the word “REINVENTION” and set out to create something brand new.  If you (and your team) limit your focus to ”reasonable” or “realistic” improvements in your current circumstance, you will stifle your ability to make a profound difference.  So DREAM BIG, but commit to ACTING SMALL.

Tougher Than The Times, Archive, Rolfe Carawan, Leadership, Keynote Speaker

Tougher Than The Times, Archive, Rolfe Carawan, Leadership, Keynote Speaker

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Actually, they were thinking of ME!

If you are “TiVo-ing” your favorite shows and skipping the commercials, you may be saving TIME, but losing a lot of opportunities to LEARN (and see me running across the screen during Monday Night Football!  Well, actually, I was in a Ford commercial that played during the game, but I digress…) Commercials (and print  or radio advertisements) can tell us a lot about people… something we can never learn enough about.

Our success at work is dependent upon people, our happiness at home involves other people, our government’s policies and decisions are made by (and supposedly for) the PEOPLE.  The more we know about how people “work” … what they want…. what they hope for… what they lack…. what they worry about… the better off we will be in all areas of our lives.

This morning I ran across an ad for the 2010 Ford Transit Connect. Their tag lines “they were thinking of me” and  ”specific for everyone” is perfect, and I suspect it will be profitable for them.  Why?  Because in a culture dominated by MASS PRODUCTION, GENERIC POLICIES, and ONE-SIZE-FITS-ALL solutions, we are desperate for someone to talk (even MARKET) directly to US…

I speak a lot about our “sovereign foundation” and honoring ourselves as part of our own “success equation”.  The reason we all have different fingerprints isn’t just so we can be identified when we commit a crime.  We are so different from each other in so many ways, shaped by both NATURE and NURTURE, and we crave focused, specific-to-us communication.   (You’d be shocked at how similar we are as well… but that is for another blog! )

It’s a great lesson we can learn from the marketing team over at Ford… a lesson we can (and should) apply at home, at work, at the gym, and on the street.  If you commit to slowing down and speaking to every person you meet in a more specific, focused way…. I think you will be shocked at how (almost instantly) your income, your influence, your happiness, and your ability to produce results improves.  If I have spoken specifically to YOU in this blog, please email me and let me know!  I would love to hear from you!

Easy Comes with a Risk

Watching a recent Staples commercial, I was again amazed at our culture’s fascination with the “EASY” button.  Commercials promise EASY (no diet, no exercise) weight loss, EASY (dollars while you sleep) money, and EASY health “fixes” in terms of the latest and greatest pills.

In fact, I want to challenge you to LISTEN to these “prescription” commercials with a new purpose.  IGNORE the “EASY” part… the part that promises instant and life-changing results.   Instead, I want you to pay attention to the “warnings”… you know, the part of the commercial in which they begin to speak really quickly.  This is when they “caution” you about the REAL risks of the drug they are pedaling.  “The risks / side effects can include heart attack, irregular menstrual cycles, and, oh yeah… DEATH.”  I’m paraphrasing, of course.

But the truth is that EASY comes with a RISK.  The risk of NO RESISTANCE is a lack of growth.  The RISK of far too easy credit is a national financial crisis.  The RISK of “blanket” tolerance is a lack of standards.  The RISK of not allowing anyone to FAIL is in the creation of an environment in which no one wins, either.  The RISK of “taking it easy” is the INABILITY to get TOUGHER THAN THE TIMES.

I am already writing a sequel to the soon –to-be-released fable:  Run to the Roar:  A Fable of Choice, Courage, and Hope. It will focus on the COURAGE of our CONVICTIONS.  As I write this book, I am reminded that our nation was built by a people that would have ruthlessly questioned (the existence of and need for) an “EASY” button.  Our American ancestors didn’t seek, hope, yearn for, NOR expect to find an “EASY” route.  They expected that life would be tough at times.  Their commitment was to be TOUGHER than the TIMES.

And sometimes… just sometimes… our greatest moments are in the “tough times”… our greatest accomplishments…. our greatest growth… our greatest contributions…

Effective Managers Learn How to Discriminate

Of course, I am not advocating a hate-based, or ignorant habit of discriminating against those you are trying to lead.  But, if you are communicating in the SAME WAY to EVERYONE under your leadership, you will not be as effective as you could be if you began to use some knowledgeable “discrimination” in how you communicate.

Here is what I am saying:  YOU and everyone you work with comes to work with their own personality and communication style.  Whether this has been developed as a result of “nature” or “nurture” or some combination of the two really doesn’t matter.  What DOES matter is your willingness to acknowledge that personality and communication styles DO IMPACT a leader’s ability to accomplish results through others.

Once you accept this as fact, the first step in using “communication discrimination” to your advantage is to learn more about personalities and communication styles.   (For a complimentary podcast, contact my assistant at rachyl@rolfecarawan.com)

Next, acknowledge your own personality tendencies and communication style, and make it a habit to recognize the same in others under your leadership.  The quickest way to develop rapport with those on your team is to made a concerted effort to minimize the stark differences between their style and your own.

When we speak and treat everyone the SAME – in the way we communicate – we will fall way short in our ability to tap into the potential of those we lead.

Me vs. Them

“… consider others better than yourselves…” – Philippians 2:3

I am always refreshingly reassured by how practical this ancient book is for today’s circumstances.  When I look at the verse above, I am positive this is never more apparent than when you consider the development of state, corporate and church leaders

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Leaders are facing unprecedented challenges today, yet there are a few time-tested principles that will allow them to be “Tougher than the Times” no matter what circumstances they face.  Developing a “THEM” mentality instead of a ”ME” mentality is one such principle.

You see, leadership isn’t about the leader at all…. only about the people he or she lead. When a leader keeps their eyes on their TEAM, instead of on THEMSELVES, we avoid many “traps” of leadership, including:

• Taking circumstances and conversations too personally;
• Clouded judgment that often comes when a leader is more interested in protecting his or her own “standing” rather than dealing with a situation more directly and objectively;
• Timid leadership;
• Stress associated with carrying every outcome squarely on your shoulders rather than sharing burdens and rewards with the team; and
• Unnecessary “power struggles” – that often completely disappear when a leader is willing to fully embrace his or her primary role: serving their team.

Leading my very first Tougher than the Times Leadership Roundtable has been incredibly exciting and rewarding already!  I would like to thank EACH leader and company represented for all you bring to the group!  Until October… we remain… Tougher than the Times!!

Raccoon Trails

Lea’s dad loved to feed nature’s bandits, the neighborhood raccoons, that is.  Behind huge open windows, we would watch nature’s parade of curious and hungry creatures.  Loaded with piles of dog food, the back porch was an open invitation that provided a pretty entertaining spectacle.  We’d stare as these furry little guys poured out of the woods and made a beeline to the food.  As many as 30 raccoons would trample through the grass, rushing to gorge themselves on the delicious morsels.  We’d sit in amazement at the little paws that would reach up and touch the windows as if to say, “More, please!” It’s safe to say, we had the fattest raccoons in all of western Washington.

For more than 20 years these raccoons would carve trails in and out of the woods.  But when Lea’s dad passed away, the raccoon trails disappeared underneath the new vegetation.  Even after generations of raccoons had destroyed nature’s beauty, the woods sprang back to life.

There’s a picture.  Patterns of thought are a lot like trampled raccoon trails.  Whatever you feed puts patterns and imprints on your mind. Consequently, if you stop feeding it, the wildlife will grow and be lush and beautiful again.  If we quit feeding negative thoughts, then our tendency to view life negatively will weaken and eventually disappear. “Take captive every thought” (2 Corin. 10:5).  We must learn to isolate every thought before it spirals into a raccoon trail.

“Learned optimism works…through the power of non-negative thinking,” says Dr. Martin Seligman, author of Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness.  Change patterns of thought by isolating a negative thought and responding to it.  “It is how you cope with negative statements that has an effect,” reiterates Seligman.  Challenge a negative thought and attack it with the truth.  It is only then that wind will blow and the dust settle, leaving a clean, unmarked trail path.

A 22 Year Profitable Relationship

It’s the perfect Sunday afternoon.  The couch is comfortable, the snacks appetizing and the game’s a close one.  As I plop into the sofa, remote in hand, I no sooner flip the game on, than I feel my wife, Lea’s hovering presence in the room.  Completely engrossed in the head-banging, I do my best to ignore her.  The hovering presence, however, keeps hovering, and I soon realize she isn’t planning on leaving.

“Everything ok, honey?” I ask half-heartedly.  One look from Lea and I realize my football watching is finito.  But, being the wonderful husband I am, I graciously turn the game off to focus all my love and attention to my lovely bride.  (Granted, we have TiVo, so all I did was hit the pause button, but that’s beside the point.)

I immediately face Lea and snap into my counseling mode.  I’m nodding my head profusely, making eye contact and making appropriate gestures, when mid-way through pouring her heart out, she stops.

“Forget it, we’ll just talk about this later,” she says, abruptly.

“What, what did I do?” I say, feeling wrongfully accused; I had been doing everything a trained counselor is supposed to do.

“Just forget it; she says more adamant than before”

Exasperated I say, “But I’m right here. I’m looking you right in the eye. I’m listening!”

“You don’t care.”

“What?!  I have to care, too?”

I was flabbergasted.  I had been doing all the right things.  I stopped watching the football game, nodded my head and even made eye contact!  But that was just it; I was just going through the motions and Lea saw right through the façade.  Behind the glazed over look and empty head nods, she knew I wasn’t listening.

It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of life and miss out on relationship.  We pass by people with fake smiles and a rhetorical, “How are you?” when we don’t really want to know.

So, in response to my question, yes, we DO have to stop and care.  Investing in relationships, whether it be family, friends or co-workers, will always pay off.  Sometimes we just need to slow down and make the deposit.